Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Why don't men like overweight girls?

Some other thoughts from the community:

  • There are many men who like overweight women. It's only the most shallow kind of person who buys into that "it's the media's fault" crap. It is far more likely to be one's personality or low self-esteem  that men find unattractive. Confidence is THE key to being irresistible. After all, if you don't like yourself, why would you expect anyone else to like you?
What society in general considers attractive is equivalent to what is healthy. In impoverished societies that extra weight would be considered attractive. The same thing goes with tans. In our culture, at least before the cancer craze, a tan was attractive since it was a sign of an active healthy life. In the past, however, tan skin was the sign of a laborer, and was not considered attractive.
  • It's not that men don't like overweight girls. It's that men, just like women, are social creatures. You probably wouldn't date a guy that most other women would consider a geek, even though you might find him attractive for one reason or another. Study after study has shown that men prefer women who have meat on their bones to those who resemble a certain hotel heiress. And study after study has shown that despite a women's body size, men prefer women who are smart, easy going, not prone to depression, are confident in themselves and their mate, etc.
The average size woman wears a size 10 to 14. Of course, how size 14 looks on you depends much on your height. A woman 6 foot tall could weight 145 pounds be as thin as a super model. But a woman 5 foot at 145 is a little chunky.
  • Also, men prefer women who appear to be healthy, and capable of producing healthy children as it is a man's animal instinct to reproduce his DNA. It is a known fact that if you are "morbidly obese" (and I choose that term because some doctors don't understand that simple obesity does not mean unhealthy) or too thin, you are unhealthy, and thereby not likely to either conceive, carry or give birth to a live healthy baby. Overweight doesn't always mean unhealthy just as thin doesn't always mean healthy.
You can be a "bigger" woman and still be healthy. Your health shows in your skin, hair, nails, eyes, and attitude.
  • Also, keep in mind that a majority of men do not marry supermodel thin women. And they don't marry women who are obsessed with their looks, whether she be obsessed with how good she looks, or obsessed with how "bad" she looks. If you're weight is causing you or could cause you some health problems, then your concentration should be on losing weight to help or prevent those problems. Once you do that, everything else, including the interest of men, will fall into place, no matter what size you are.
  • Take heart ladies: a poll posted on MSN about 1-2 years ago about men's preference in women showed that American men actually prefer a woman who is somewhat meaty over the anorexic bimbo types; and this was by a clear majority in votes.
It is definitely a cultural phenomena. In many countries, women who are "overweight" are considered desirable. Thankfully, for many women there are increasing numbers of weight diversity tolerance groups. Be confident in who you are. A slim waist may attract for a moment but a WIDE smile will enlist a life mate.
  • Look at ads for beer or football, pick up a Playboy, or turn on Cinemax after about 11pm and you'll see what is culturally defined as "sexy". A man (usually younger) who objectifies women and sees them as objects of gratification is probably less likely to value a woman's other qualities over her appearance. It's not so much that men don't like overweight women, it's that men are visual creatures and "sexy" is very culturally dictated (if you don't believe that, take a course in sociology). Those aforementioned media types dictate what sexy is and overweight is not "sexy". But those are anonymous sex objects, so a man may find a larger woman sexy for her mind if he actually gets to know her.
Men do not generally like looking at overweight girls. This does not mean they cannot like an overweight girl. Compensation is almost always possible and it can and is applied to all types of situations in life. A charismatic overweight girl has more of a shot with a man who is seeking someone to connect with than an uncharismatic beautiful girl. Similarly, this same uncharismatic beautiful girl has better chances with a shallow man seeking pure sex than does an overweight yet charismatic female. This is of course, assuming the obvious fact that many of us are products of culture and our perceptions are invariably influenced by culture.
 Still, our perceptions of beauty and our perceptions of a wonderful person are not the same. An overweight girl can be liked by men; however, she may find it necessary to compensate in some respects in order to compete with and surmise over her thinner female peers.
  • Some men actually do like overweight girls
  • Just be proud of who you are, realise that you are beautiful, powerful, and let your inner confidence shine through, and you will attract many men who didn't even know that they would consider a larger woman.

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